Many sources suggest we rebuke so as not to bear a grudge (lo titor). But the Midrash and several meforshim (discussed here) suggest that the main purpose of rebuke is to keep one's fellow, and oneself by proxy--as one shares responsibility for the sin--from sinning.
Which of these interpretations is correct as it concerns the question of whether we should rebuke someone for doing something that is offensive to us, but not necessarily a sin? For example, asking for very trivial favors or berating us for trivial oversights when we have just told them we are going through something terrible, ch"v. In this case, or similar:
1) May we rebuke them? (There is always some risk of embarrassing the addressee, which I see as a potentially competing halacha in such cases)
2) Must we rebuke them?
3) What is the best way to rebuke them?
Assume we are at risk of bearing a grudge if we do not rebuke.
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